23 weeks 1 day

Ok, so I'm not technically a momma yet, but I am well on my way. Baby in utero? Check. Swollen, sore breasts? Check. Expanding belly? Check. Irrational mood swings? Check. Definitely on my way to mommahood. And I'm not nearly as mindful as I should be or could be, but that is a never-ending journey. There have been times I've made great strides, others where I've fallen into deep, dark holes having to crawl my way back out. I've lost my way many times, but I will never stop trying to get there. Striving to be better. Mindful that I want to be more mindful.

No time like the present. Especially now that the stakes have been raised. Time to get back on the mindful path. If there were ever a good time, it would be now. It's not just about me anymore. Hence the blog. I always find it healing, helpful, and healthy to write about my journey in life. Keeps me accountable. Forces me to take the good and the bad out of the secret hiding places of my mind and either give the good more power or take the power away from the bad. Acknowledge what I'm doing that feels right and examine where I need to improve. In particular, I want to focus on my nutrition, exercise, and overall well-being.

First step: Inventory - Where am I now?

Nutrition is not too bad, but there is room for improvement. Protein, fruit and dairy are all adequate. Vegetables could increase. I generally eat a salad on weekdays for work, but I need more variety. I want to make more of an effort to eat vegetables with dinner, which is usually just whatever meat M feels like barbecuing. Sugar intake is not terribly high, but still too high for my liking, as is salty, fried foods like potato chips. I have good days and bad days. More good than bad, but the bad should still be fewer.

Exercise needs improvement. Besides my regular gym-going for the first 6 weeks of pregnancy, before I knew, I've been to the gym 3 times, plus one workout at home. More recently, I've followed a Prenatal Pilates video, but not consistently. Before it got too hot, I was hiking the trails around here a couple of times per week, but that has dwindled for various reasons. I have been walking on the seawall at lunch (30-50 minutes) most weekdays, which is great, but I think I need to do more that involves helping prepare my body for birth.

Meditation also needs improvement. I was listening to Holosync every night before going to sleep, but it's been awhile since I've done that, I think simply because I took my earphones away from my bedside. I would like to find some meditations that are more specific to pregnancy to prepare me for visualization and relaxation.

I'm currently reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. That book is putting me in a really good headspace as far as the birthing experience. I've decided to switch from my doctor to a midwife so that I can have the best experience possible without any medical intervention. I'm feeling so much better about my decision. The doctor route was making me slightly uneasy as much as I tried to tell myself that a safe and healthy delivery was all that mattered. That's not true. I want to begin my life as a Mindful Momma with the a beautiful, natural experience right from the get-go and I believe I can.

I've also signed up for Prenatal Yoga at the rec-centre, starting September 11. It's on Tuesday night at 7:30. I wish it was earlier. It will be a challenge to venture out that late, but it's important. And I've pre-paid. So I'm determined to stick with it.

I'm on track I think. I plan to improve my nutrition, increase my exercise, resume meditation and start taking control of my birthing experience. All positive, mindful plans. Now to put the plans into action.

Until tomorrow. Good night. Sweet dreams!